& your bird can sing (bangflip) wrote in fashionedlover,
& your bird can sing

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Title: You're My Favorite Thing About the West Coast
Class: Expository Writing
Prompt: Five Paragraph Essay - Favorite Person or Place. i obviously wrote about ashton ahurhur.


Eryn Meeker

Expository Writing

Mrs. Pickens

16 February 2009

You’re My Favorite Thing About the West Coast

            The trials of distance can gradually deteriorate a relationship, but in a few special cases, strength is born from the often times painful separation. Some skeptics believe that because two people have never met in person, they can’t be in an actual relationship, which is hardly the truth. Individuals vary, that’s a universal rule. Therefore, there’s a high chance that a person will connect immeasurably with someone else a great distance from them. Destined lovers meet each other on international vacations, pen-pals write letters to form friendships over miles and miles of land, and perfect strangers passing on the street are soul mates. The Internet (granted, when finding someone who actually is who they say they are) is no different; if anything, it’s a convenient vessel for interpersonal connection – pardon the unintended pun. My own story involves elements others may doubt either because of my age or the environment in which it’s played out. However, I reserve the right to remain silent in order to retain some dignity when faced with the criticism of those who lack understanding or a mind that’s open to possibilities. 

            Ashton Gonsalves is a resident of Sacramento, California, which is approximately 2,300 miles from Monroe, Michigan. (For additional emphasis, it would take 33 hours to travel by car continuously and 31 days and 8 hours by walking.) Despite the distance between us, we’ve created a strong bond that I’ve yet to find a rival for. Being a slight skeptic myself, I, before meeting Ashton, hadn’t believed that I could find someone to connect to other than my best friend, Jen, and I found myself always settling for second best. It was a pleasure to challenge my own belief and find someone who was all I ever wanted and more. I’m completely convinced, nearly to the point of foolishness, that I’ve found my soul mate, if such a thing does exist.

            Many people have their fair share of horror stories when it comes to the Internet — most involving perverts and conversations started with a “sexy” compliment and a cleverly placed winking emoticon. I myself, at the tender age of 11, convinced a 31-year-old buddy of mine to refrain from cheating on his wife. Four years later, with a little more experience under my belt, I met Ashton. A few common interests blossomed into an acquaintanceship and after a number of months exchanging, “Hi, how are you's," and leaving the conversation at that, a friendship was formed which then developed into us becoming best friends. The skepticism may start there. Some may ask how can one be best friends with someone else over the Internet? Truthfully, it’s complicated and some factors are missing but the core remains in tact. Friendship is not at all about simply being with a person; it’s about a level of understanding, a shoulder to cry on regardless if it’s tangible, and enjoying someone’s company — again, whether or not they may actually be there is irrelevant. A strong majority of it is emotional rather than physical, which is a truth both Ashton and I have come to realize.  If doubts have already begun to be formed they’ll surely be cemented with the following confession: Ashton and I are together.  Obviously, it can’t be described as dating, but I think most will settle with “monogamous commitment.” Previously, I’d dated a handful of people in Monroe and found them all lacking — they were too touchy, not touchy enough, personalities clashed, a level of understanding was practically nonexistent, or I thought there was more to the relationship than there really was. The longest of my dating adventures lasted a month while the average was two weeks and not once did I feel as happy as I feel now. Not to mention that in most cases, I did the breaking up. A fiercely independent person, I can not stand what most other girls consider the ideal man. I prefer not to be hindered by an arm around my waist and would much rather walk on my own. The time difference of three hours between the Mideast and West Coast allows me to finish tasks before Ashton signs online and even then, we both do things individually. Aside from the number of miles and the seldom bouts of loneliness that are almost always demolished by a small confession that wouldn’t mean half as much if said by anyone else, I’ve been handed a nearly perfect situation and an emotional completion that I had not felt prior.

            Unfortunately, I am pessimist who considers herself an optimist. My worst trait is my obliviousness to my own worth. Thus, when larger-than-life individuals enter my life, I feel undeserving and gradually push them away. From there, I find someone much more realistic to me, usually someone who is thought of as a waste of time by my friends, and settle with them until I grow bored. Ashton is no different when it comes to my inferiority complex. In fact, he is quite possibly the most compatible person I’ve ever had feelings for and the results of my constant downgrading are certainly showing. Because the physical aspect is missing, I can only compare the two of us on a personal level — how we think, react, differ. The truth that I may actually be suitable for someone and vice versa is almost too much for me to handle. We’re both intelligent lovers of language who are easily enchanted by worlds other than our own. Ashton, however, is a much more talented writer than I. The happiness of others is a common priority, but my selfish tendencies and weaknesses are much more apparent. The same sense of humor is present in both of us, yet Ashton is exceedingly original and funny. I lack the capability to describe him in the way that I’d like for the respect and admiration I hold for him is not able to be expressed eloquently enough to make others understand how my devotion stretches across more than 2,000 miles of land — especially not in an essay limited by five paragraphs. I’ve discovered an equal I deserve and for me to understand that now is nearly impossible.

             As a child, I must have had an inkling as to what my future would hold. A heavy believer in love and soul mates, I was always upset that possibly, the person I would fall in love with lived in Spain and we would never meet and if we did, the language barrier could not be crossed which led to the even more depressing realization on my easily crushed, single-digit mind: “I may never fall in love.” To think that I was  somewhat right is a funny thought. The element of distance is present but my hopelessly romantic, double-digit soul has yet to be crushed by a lack of love. This would be when those who doubt the genuineness of my feelings really speak their minds. “It’s impossible,” they claim, “to have any real emotions for someone behind a screen.” It’s pathetic, they imply. Make some real friends, they advise between the lines. In all honesty, I’d prefer not to. Long before coming clean with how I felt, I knew I’d made a lifelong friend; I just happened to be very lucky that my best friend developed a crush on me as well. At this point, I don’t want to imagine spending my life with anyone else, and I desperately hope that I’m not proven wrong.

            People come and go and that’s a truth I’ve learn a hundred times over. Your “best friend forever” might be around for a year while the girl you share an idle conversation with in 4th period may serve a major role in your life in ten. Ashton is one of the few people I wish to know long after high school is over and done with  — as a romantic partner, a friend, or the receiver of an occasional phone call. The connection I feel with Ashton is not something I would dismiss without a glorious, raging fight for his influence has given me the will to fight for something I want to protect. Even if my other half is on the opposite coast, I feel more complete now than I did a year ago, even involved with someone I could reach out and touch. Call me a fool, a teenager incapable of understanding how the world works, or whatever you wish. It’s difficult to vanquish all doubt (even in myself) that I very well may, but for the time being, I’m content with my ignorance.

Tags: expository writing, school
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